Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Full Swing
With all that said I am going to talk about what I know, and right now it is not a whole lot about baseball, except that the Dodgers without ManRam and with their seemingly no name starting rotation are still gaming! Let's take a look at the winning pitchers in some of the recent games, the last 14 W's to be precise: Milton, Wolf, Kershaw, Milton, Ohman, Broxton, Leach, Billingsley, Troncoso, Kershaw, Weaver, Broxton, Wolf, Stults, in that order working backwards.... ummm minus, Bills these are all washed up has beens, never were-beens, or not there yet beens (in the case of Kershaw). This seems rather phenominal to me, since any human with an IQ equal to or greater than an 8 year old should realize that the loss of your best offensive player and the reliance upon unproven pitchers and proven pitchers (proven to not be that good) in the case of Wolf and Weaver, should lead to all things unbearable, like watching the Rockies, Nationals, or Royals of old.
The whole freakin' staff has been solid for the most part, and somehow, Juan D'Vaughn Pierre HAS substituted as well as just about anyone could for ManRam... INCREDIBLE! Never thought I would see the day. Casey Blake is hitting right at the .300 mark, Raffi is by far the worst offender that gets regular at bats. This is borderline mind boggling to me. Rather than watching this all take place, I have been spending my time watching the most pathetic professional sport in history... the NBA, or as I prefer to say the National BasketballGamesDecidedAndRuinedByReferees Association. Maybe I can not watch the Dodgers into a World Series victory, time will tell.
Does anyone else hate the NBA right now? I'm a big time Laker fan and I can't even stand to watch. I always hated Reggie Miller for starting the "I'm gonna shoot and then kick the defender while I am in the air, but fall down so it will be a foul on him" flop. Same goes for Vlade. Now all these idiots do is flop, the NBA turned into Mexican league soccer. I want dudes getting McHaled and Isaiah Thomased and crushed down low for pulling stupid stunts. Remember when Chuck and Shaq threw punches at each other? Nothing even happened, now ANdrew Bynum gets a flagrant for blocking the ball with two hands and catching a little forearm. How could anyone watch this? The whole NBA is filled with guys that should be in prison, or probably were in prison at some point. The whole Nuggets team looks like the C Block at San Quentin and the more head/arm/leg bands and jacked up 3 pt attempts the more "baller" you are... &*$% THAT!!! To top it all off, the playoffs take 7 months to complete now I think.
So, what have we learned... absolutely nothing about the Dodgers, except that they defy all reason. The NBA is like way super homo lame. And Jeopardy has been the only thing on TV worth watching lately. I think I am going to go on the show, I have been owning lately... just like the Dodgers have defied all logic, I, the guy who has been too busy to read the paper, let alone anything filled with pertinent knowledge and insight into the world has been ripping Jeopardy apart. My golf game goes from high 70's to low 90's every other round, I hate the NBA now, I would rather watch a Canadian gameshow host than sports, and I swear the other day I saw the sun rise in the West.
I don't know what the hell is going on with the world. Peace out, girl scouts.
Monday, May 18, 2009
an homage....
Courtesy of ESPN. and tribute to firejoemorgan.com
The mayor of JuanPierreWood, an idyllic subdivision of Chavez Ravine, believes in giving an honest effort for a day's pay. He's making $10 million this year. If you compute the extra time he logs in the batting cage, the weight room and the outfield shagging flies, it works out to about eight bucks an hour.
"quite frankly, i don't care if it works out to the working wage of a 7 year old Filipino boy working in a sweatshop with bleeding fingers while putting together Lebron's newest shoe. anyone making $10 million a year should produce. he could literally roll out of bed and swing the bat with eye boogers still intact while trying to fight off a hangover. as long as he puts up numbers that contributes into winning baseball, work ethic doesn't matter to me."
The previous mayor -- back when the place was called Mannywood -- was also deadly serious about his work ethic. But he did some bad things and had to go away for a while. He'll return Friday, July 3, at Petco Park in San Diego at 7:05 p.m. Pacific time, for those keeping score at home.
Juan Pierre knows full well that no matter how many hits he accumulates or bases he steals in the next six weeks -- no matter where the Dodgers stand in the National League West -- many of the fans who filled those Mannywood seats in left field will be stricken with Manny Ramirez fever as the big day approaches.
"The fans have treated me well at Dodger Stadium," Pierre said, "but I think they're patiently awaiting Manny's return. I know that. I'm a fan of the game, too, and I know baseball. But there's no sense worrying about something when you can't control it."
It has been 11 days since Ramirez received a 50-game suspension for violating Major League Baseball's drug policy, prompting fans to respond with a mixture of anger and sadness, columnists to rage about the ongoing steroid scourge, and Dodgers manager Joe Torre to reshuffle his batting order.
Pierre, inserted into the lineup on May 7, is playing like a guy who's trying to recoup all the hits he lost while missing 43 games in 2008. He's batting .465 (20-for-43) with six stolen bases since replacing Ramirez in left field.
In 83 plate appearances this season, Pierre has struck out twice. In a 12-5 victory in Florida on Sunday, he even received his sixth career intentional walk.
The Dodgers were hoping Pierre could fill a void. For the first 10 games, he's gone all Rickey Henderson on them.
"as much as it pains me to say, i have to admit that juan 'the out-making machine' pierre is doing awesome. i nearly passed out from shock when he received the intentional walk. simply incredible. i would have bet my firstborn child that this would never have happened while he wore a dodger uniform. (thank goodness i payed for that abortion)"
"The way he prepares himself, he's always game-ready," second baseman Orlando Hudson said. "When you see him sitting out for a while and then you look at his numbers and what he's been doing jump-starting the lineup, it's phenomenal."
Torre essentially had two options when Ramirez began his suspension. He could have kept shortstop Rafael Furcal at leadoff and Hudson in the No. 2 hole and plugged in Pierre lower down the order. Or he could have opted for Plan B and gone with a track team in the first three spots.
Pierre spent his first two games batting ninth behind the pitcher. Then Torre changed course May 9 against San Francisco, moving him to leadoff. Under the new configuration, Furcal is batting second and Hudson is hitting third, where he had logged more than 700 career at-bats in Toronto and Arizona.
The new-look L.A. lineup brings to mind the 1985 St. Louis Cardinals, who won 101 games with Vince Coleman batting leadoff, Willie McGee hitting second and Tommy Herr driving in 110 runs on eight homers in the No. 3 spot. Torre agreed that Los Angeles' new lineup has some of that old St. Louis appeal, "minus the AstroTurf."
The Dodgers have outscored opponents 40-14 in the first inning this season, so they don't give other teams much room to breathe.
"irrelevant stat. most of those runs were accumulated while manny's impotent wood was still in the lineup"
"You stack those guys, especially two of them [Hudson and Furcal] being switch-hitters, and they can cause some problems," Torre said. "When Manny was here, there was a lot of conversation about protecting Manny. 'Who's going to hit behind him?' But the protection part comes from who's on base when he hits."
Pierre isn't exactly Joe Softball Player. From the start of 2001 through the end of 2007, he racked up 1,378 hits -- more than any big leaguer not named Ichiro Suzuki. For point of reference, Derek Jeter, Albert Pujols and Miguel Tejada ranked third, fourth and fifth in the majors during that span.
"i hate this stat. he also ranked in the top 5 in outs all those years that he played regularly. the aforementioned players do not share that distinction."
But all those knocks don't translate into much of an on-base percentage. During the past four years, Pierre hit in the .280 to .290 range annually with an OBP around .330. Those numbers reflect a very competent big leaguer, but they won't save a guy from criticism when he's making $44 million on a five-year contract.
"5 years/$44 million for Juan Pierre. Fire Ned Colletti"
After the Dodgers signed Andruw Jones last year, doled out more playing time to prospects Andre Ethier and Matt Kemp and acquired Ramirez in a July deadline trade, it was inevitable that Pierre would be spending more time riding what he calls the "piney woods."
"Andruw Jones is currently raking for the Rangers and is on the Dodgers payroll. Fire Ned Colletti."
Pierre played 162 games every year from 2003 through 2007, and his lack of an "on-off" switch made it hard for him to accept all that bench time. He didn't win any public relations points in August when the team asked him to move from left field to center to accommodate Ramirez, and he told reporters, "All I've ever done is be Juan Pierre when I wear this jersey. They're sticking it to me this year for whatever reason."
"here were some of the reasons.
1) you had put up underwhelming numbers for 3 straight years at the plate and the field.
2) manny is awesome. you are not.
3) you referred to yourself in the 3rd person."
It was natural to conclude that Pierre was pouting. But he's quiet even during the best of times, so his internal struggles did little to alter the clubhouse dynamic. Pierre, by all accounts, never strayed from his grueling workout regimen or acted territorially around his teammates.
"again... i don't care about his propensity to work hard. i can work hard to become an NBA center, but some things just aren't meant to be."
“”-- Dodgers second baseman Orlando Hudson on teammate Juan Pierre
The way he prepares himself, he's always game-ready. When you see him sitting out for a while and then you look at his numbers and what he's been doing jump-starting the lineup, it's phenomenal.
Ethier is Pierre's regular pregame throwing partner, and he said he never felt a sense of resentment from Pierre as they competed for at-bats.
"He's been there the whole time for us, especially me and Matt," Ethier said. "We've been there elbow-to-elbow trying to compete for playing time in the outfield. But he's never turned his back and been a guy who says, 'Forget those guys.' He's been really accessible."
Torre, who likes to use veteran players to police the clubhouse, found Pierre to be a willing lieutenant in the chain of command last season.
"Matt Kemp was on a roller coaster with his performance, and Juan was always there," Torre said. "If I needed to get a message to Matt and I thought it would be best delivered by Juan, he wouldn't be like, 'Uhh, OK.' He was very open and made sure when he did deliver it, that it was done in the right way."
This year, Pierre has found a new pal in Hudson, who is as gregarious as Pierre is introverted. They crossed paths 10 years ago while chirping at each other in Class A ball, and as self-made players who grew up in the South, they have a lot in common.
Pierre is from Louisiana, and Hudson hails from South Carolina. Pierre roots for the LSU Tigers, while Hudson cheers for the South Carolina Gamecocks. They've talked about baseball and hashed out their college football differences over fried chicken, macaroni and cheese, candied yams and collard greens at Roscoe's House of Chicken 'N Waffles in Los Angeles.
"why is this in the article? is this to inform the reader that these players are both black and from the south?"
Hudson smiled when asked who would win a footrace between the speedsters at the top of the L.A. order.
"I think it would be Furcal," Hudson said. "He'd probably edge Juan P., and I would definitely be third. A distant third. Those guys can go."
Before a game in Philadelphia last week, as his teammates lingered in the outfield, Pierre worked up a sweat taking fungoes off the bat of bench coach Bob Schaefer. It's this type of preparation that allows a player to go from bench guy to line-drive machine at the drop of a hat -- or an MLB-issued news release.
"i'm happy for pierre and more importantly and i'm glad the dodgers offense is still productive. but this 'line-drive machine' is somewhat a product of luck. his BABIP stands at .431. obscenely high and completely unsustainable. "
For what it's worth, L.A. fans truly seem to appreciate Pierre's earnest approach to the game. Some enterprising Dodger-watchers recently began selling "JuanPierreWood" and "Juan's World" T-shirts online. Word is they're selling like candied yams and collard greens.
Ask Pierre whether he would be happy to just concentrate on baseball rather than doing interviews to share his "feelings" about replacing Ramirez, and he lights up like the Dodger Stadium parking lot during a 10-run blowout.
"Oh yeah, I love the game," Pierre said. "Once they say, 'Play ball,' that's the best part of the day for me. I don't need the glitz and the glamour or to be noticed. I've been invisible here for the last month and a half before this. I would rather just keep it that way."
"so he would rather rob the dodgers of $44 million and be invisible instead of actually earning his money through producing on the diamond? i guess he really was laughing his way to the bank"
It's a little too late for anonymity. The circus is on hiatus, and Pierre is making the best of a bittersweet situation, trying to squeeze in as many hits as possible while Dodgers fans count the days until Manny's return.
"please continue this level production. do not revert to the 2005-2007 juan pierre that i have learned to abhor. earn that ridiculous contract that ned gave you. i want to like you juan...i really do. but i will never be convinced you are worth $44 million dollars over 5 years."
Thursday, May 14, 2009
ESPN "Guru"
I wish I could play against Rick Paulas in fantasy, because he isn't very good at paying attention. Clearly had a deadline he was behind on so he just whipped this out. I only needed to see the first comparison he made to know this. Russel Martin, while very lackluster to start the season, is hitting .438, OBP .581 and his OPS is 1.050 in the month of May. Raising his average and OPB over 80 and 100 points respectively for the season in half a months worth of work. It might be fair to say he is actually EN FUEGO right now.
I'll be the first to admit his power is still lacking and the extra base hits are not really there, but it would appear he has found the stroke we have come to expect from him. The ship has been righted. you would be an idiot to dump a guy who has produced like that in the last 14 days, and has the track record to prove he is a productive cather. Oh ya and all that talk about too many strikeout... 11 BB and 3 K in the month of May.
Apparently any idiot can get the full time pay of a sports journalist without the basic skills necessary to complete the job, i.e. credibility and accuracy. What do I know though, I am just a full time member of the work force and a part time sports fan and a lowly blogger. dodgerblueballs dot com. If you are interested in some journalism that is at least loosely based in reality and statistics.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
how good/bad is the dodgers' pitching staff?
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Hate to say I told you so...
Remember my rather lengthy recent post about only three Dodgers being worth a darn with RISP? Well we just lost the biggest one of those three for 50 games. The call I sent out to "not so big game" James Loney, Russell J.Martin, and Matt "slider down and away" Kemp must be answered now if the Dodgers want to have any chance of going 25-25 over the next 50 games. Luckily they are currently playing in the NL Worst so the .500 record might be enough to hold the lead until Manny gets back. Hopefully O-Dog can stay healthy and continue to out perform his own personal history.
I would like to hope that this was just one bad game that got away. I understand there are 162 of them, so you can't possibly have it all going for you in every one of those games. Yet, at the same time I am highly concerned now, because the holes that Manny covered up with his ridiculous production are now going to be exposed. His absence, obviously effects the the rest of the line-up, if for no other reason than the fact that there is no way on God's green earth that Juan Pierre is going to come close to replacing his run production. Especially when Juan D'Vaughn is hitting 9th, behind the pitcher.
I hope I am wrong, but just a fair warning so that none of you are shocked in a month or two, if the Martin, Loney, Kemp, Furcal platoon do not start playing up to their ability and producing at least average numbers (in the case of Russ and Raffi) and the slightly above average numbers they are suppose to be capable of then we are going to have a serious problem. As a side note, Kemp has actually been quite productive, he simply needs to remain as such, the sub-par BA/RISP is mainly why he has been lumped in with the salary thieves. If these three continue on the same production paths and O-Dog and/or Andre come back down from their magic carpet rides, where second basemen have OPS over 1.000 and Angry Dragons soar through the clouds with all those mashed homerun balls, Los Doyers are going to lick balloon knot.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
A Little Thing I like to Call Manny's Wood
Oddly enough, that is why we are here for this installment, Manny couldn't perform when it counted... and I am in no way referring to baseballs, bats, or leather gloves, well maybe I am (I have no idea what Man Ram is into: his business) but as this is a family show I will leave it at that. Poor Manny was just lookin' to please the laydayzzzz (see how I can type and make it sound sexy: someone nominate me for a Pulitzer) and his punishment, about two months of unpaid leave. Poor guy, all that time on his hands and he can't even get his swurve on... because he only swings the wood on the baseball field, apparently his bedroom wood needs that extra edge and that is what got him in this position in the first place!
Honestly, if this is in fact true it WOULD BE freakin hilarious, if Manny still played for the Red Sox. I'm talking like BITCH TITS funny too. I'm sure by now you all know my hatred for the Red Sox. As it stands right now, this is like the worst thing that could ever happen. I am not mad at Manny, and even if he really was on roids I wouldn't be surprised because, again, everyone it seems juiced something at some point in the last decade or two. I am half expecting to find out Greg Maddux was juicing when he was pumping those 86 MPH fastballs down the pipe at age 40. I really do not care about steroids, unless it's Barry Bonds we are talking about, he is a cheater. the may have just gone from hero to zero in as long as it takes Manny to perform in the bedroom (without his pills).
I hope you are all prepared for a .500 record for the next 50 games, if we are lucky. Set MLB history one day, and the next your throwing out the sheets and going to Target for new linens because you just shat the bed, baseball much like life can be a fickle bitch. I really have nothing else to contribute to this, I've been sleep deprived the last few days and now this, so my thought process is a little screwy. Hope it was fun. Take 'er easy (and if she;s that easy, take 'er twice) ZING! POW! phhhtt... the last one is Manny in the sack.
Editor's Note: Dodger Blue Balls would like to express the the deranged ramblings exhibited by some of its writers are not the Company's stance. Dodger Blue Balls would dually like to apologize for even allowing one of their writers to reduce this once informative site to a smut-peddling den of iniquity filled with tasteless bedroom humor. The writer , OJ, will surely be let go any day now.
Really, Manny, Really?
A source close to Manny Ramirez(notes) said Thursday that the illegal substance for which the Los Angeles Dodgers slugger tested positive was not “an agent customarily used for performance enhancing.”
At least not on the baseball diamond. The source, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said the substance is supposed to boost sex drive. It is not Viagra, but a substance that treats the cause rather providing a temporary boost in sexual performance, the source said.
Turns out he really was taking PED's to be better with the wood (ba-dum-bum... thank you, I'll be here all day).